The
Republican campaign to regain the White House looked like a roller derby.
First they sent Herman Cain, who knocked everyone around until they discovered his weakness and smashed him against the railings. Then with poor Herman sidelined with his injuries, they sent Newt Gingrich to clear the field with his size and wealth of tricks. They pummeled him with blows from all sides and pounced on him. They brought him down in a heap. It was somewhat embarrassing seeing the big fella take such a tumble.
Then they shoved the fragile Ron Paul forward. Unwilling as he was at first, he seemed to enjoy the early going. The opposition laughed so hard, seeing how Ol' Ron was avoiding getting nailed, they missed many opportunities to level him and sweep the floor with him. Finally, it was time to win this thing and they sent in Mitt Romney with his perfect hairdo and all. He managed to charm the hell out of them for a spell; then they badgered and roughed him up pretty good. He learned his lesson and went to the back of the pack and pretended to guard Michele Bachmann, who was biding her time with clenched teeth.
Then it happened. Rick Perry and Rick Santorum grabbed Michele by her two hands and propelled her forward. They knocked down the last of the stragglers of the decimated Democratic field and propelled Michele down the middle. She hunkered down and rode out the last few yards, pumping her elbows. Then sensing victory, she shot her clenched fists into the air, triumphant, as she cruised across the finish line.
Then I woke up, and Ron Paul was still defending himself against charges that he knew nothing about the racist newsletters, etc.
Nothing had changed since I last heard. What a dream!
Actually, a little teamwork might help win this thing for the Republicans. If only the candidates were willing to sacrifice; this would be a great strategy.
Dec. 30, 2011